Taking a short detour from ZsaZsa

I promise I will continue with the saga of this infernal cow…but I need a break from her right now.  I went out just last week to do the afternoon feed and there she was…in the neighbor’s fenced-in front yard.  How she got there, I have no idea.  I checked all the fence lines and saw no downed fences.  These fences are three and four strand barbed wire fences (4 feet high).  She’s either an open jumping cow (and I’ll make a ton of money) or she’s like a snake or mouse that can squish their bodies into the smallest spaces.  In any case, I don’t think she’s one bit funny or talented or cute or amazing or any other superlative.  I think she’s a total pain in the ass.  So, after going into the neighbor’s yard (through a closed and secured gate) I attempted to get her to follow me.  Four feed forward, three feet back for about an hour.  Had enough.  Got the Mini Cooper (yes, a mini cooper – I don’t want to hear your snickering) and the mini did the job.  No, I did not hit her.  I need the car.  She’s afraid of the Mini as it has been called into service for just this purpose in the past.  We (the mini and I) chased her out the the neighbor’s yard, through the gate and down the long long driveway to the main road, made her take a right, chased her down the main road to my driveway, made her take another right, chased her up my long long driveway to the barn.  Got out of the mini, opened the gate to the other cows and she ran in.  Friggin cow.

On top of this bog, I’ve been asked to write a children’s book about ZsaZsa the Runaway Cow.  You have no idea how much I want to not even think about this damned cow and now I have to write a children’s book.  Really?  And I can’t use any four letter words?  This is going to be difficult.  So, for blog purposes, I’m taking a break from the Houdini Cow and will write about other strange animals and daily weirdness.  Thank you for understanding (and saving me from becoming an alcoholic).


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